Sounds like the two of you have totally unrealistic ideas about sex. First, your wife thinks you should be hard all the time, and second, you feel responsible for her pleasure.
Take a step back and think about what these expectations are doing to your enjoyment of sex. Now it's time to talk as adults, not angry children. I know she hurt you, but she's probably feeling fearful or unattractive because she associates being attractive with you having a hard erection for hours on end. When you don't, she may fear you don't want her.
You can have great sex together if you let go of these expectations, find things to do that you both enjoy, whether they end in orgasm or not, and, above all, communicate openly and honestly with each other. Best of luck to you. Dr. J
These is just to tell you all that I’m one of the people that has taken bucket of water from the ocean thinking the water level will diminish. Married for 18 years.
My wife and I are not in good relationship anymore.
She has been texting a guy for almost a year since 2008 when Obama was running his campaigns. I found a lot of phone text exchanges but never seen the actual words. Was being charged for all the text communication with this guy.
In March 2009 I went for short term disability, My mum passed away in April 2009, I stayed home with grief/mourning my mother. While she is having time with this guy. In August 31, 2009 I found out about this guy, she apologize saying that it just a friend nothing physical, I tried to let go but every day since that day my life has changes and feels like my wife is cheating on me. I ‘m the one that always interested with sex, I always ask but about 96% she will say NO! – If you can see my wife she is the most sexiest woman that is alive, she is very curvy like God designed her just for guys to go for it the way she looks no kidding, any guy will hit on her.
As said, with those feelings that I think she is cheating on me, she will not answer me sometime when I ask her or talk to her. She is very mean to me. When on bad trying to touch her breasts, she push my hand away and get angry, she agrees to have sex with me after the sex she will seem to be annoyed looking at her face, and she would ask me why I’m looking at her like that, she will drug me to the Gym even if when I don’t fell like it, my wife has history of having phone numbers for people when I ask she will go mad. She likes shopping.
Yesterday night, I asked for sex, she said she doesn’t feel like, I got frustrated I went crazy I starting saying why every time I ask for sex you most the time you always have excuses. And I honestly said to her that it looks like you getting it somewhere else, she mad and we started arguing and I brought it back that the guy she has been testing for almost a year, we went on and on she said that if I need the truth I said yes, she then said she never been SATISFIED IN OUR SEXUAL LIFE – That was a chock and drove me to have a conclusion that she is having it outside, I really got mad and we went on and on again and she called the cops for me. The police came in the house at night around 11:30 night. They ask me about what the problem was? I explained and they asked if we can resolve it. So we slept until this morning that I’m writing this email.
I need help what to do?